Someone showed me “This Machine Destroys EVERYTHING” last year and it got under my skin like a tick. The website for JWC International—self-proclaimed makers of the “World’s Finest Sludge Grinder”—indicates that the machine is called the Muffin Monster Grinder and it is available in many models of different sizes. I am assuming they all have a similar function,to destroy everything—plywood, celery, cantaloupes, Wilson tennis balls, Tampax, Kotex, shoes—but I did not know for sure, so I wrote to JWC’s Marketing Manager, Alec Mackie, with some questions. –AMELIA STEIN
AS: “This Machine Destroys EVERYTHING” has had over four million views on YouTube. Why is the video so popular?
AM: I think it combines two things that draw people in: it’s something you don’t see everyday—how often do you see sanitary napkins and army blankets getting chewed up?—and destruction. People love to watch things get destroyed; just look at Hollywood blockbusters.
AS: One of the commenters on YouTube wrote: “put a machine just like it in and lets see who wins.” Could a Muffin Monster Grinder destroy itself?
AM: What!! Grinder cannibalization?! I’m shocked they’d ask such a question. Never! Against the laws of waste grinding and physics. We’re proud of the Monster machines we build here in Santa Ana, California and would never pit them against one another.
AS: Is there anything the Muffin Monster Grinder can’t destroy?
AM: It can’t destroy itself. The grinder is built to pass huge quantities of wastewater while shredding all the rag balls, mop heads, rocks, trash, and debris that get into the sewer system. So it’s tough, like an ultimate movie action hero, but it’s not Superman. The Muffin Monster can’t chew on steel.
AS: I notice that a lot of the other videos on the JWC site don’t have music. Do you know who composed the soundtrack for the video “This Machine Destroys EVERYTHING”?
AM: We get that question a lot, along with various comments about what other types of videos that music could accompany. I don’t know. The video was done in the 1990s, before my time. I’ve been here 10 years and we’ve used that video every year. Since the music plays on loop for 6-8 hours at trade shows, it was driving our salespeople crazy. Just last year we recorded a newer, better, sharper Monster Grinder loop with up-to-date music. I miss the old version though. It was a classic.